OK, This is not an end all list to making it to the Posers section at BitCandy aka "Most Hyped Fails"... but if you see anyone else with this below list... it's probably a good indication that it's going there. In case you were wondering who we were talking about, it's Canadian artists Lights and her new album. Unfortunately, Lights 2nd album "Siberia" came out October 4th. You didn't hear that it came out? Oh, actually... that's good news for you.
It's not that this album is horrible. It's just that this album is kinda in the "good minus" meets "so what" category. 2 categories I'm not a fan of (my pet peeve if you haven't noticed). Futhermore there's something about Lights' overall presentation that's trying to be saying, "Hey I'm cool, I'm Indie, alternative pop... believe in me!)... but deep down we know she doesn't quite belong in that circle.
Anyway... compliments of this album, I thought I'd create these step by step instructions on how to make it to the "Poser" section at BitCandy:
1. In your publicity photos, make sure you "pose" and shows off as many of your trendy tattoos in one shot as possible.
2. Write your album with someone really cool and cutting edge like "Tawgs" who's biggest success has been writing for Josh Groban (I shit you not: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tawgs_Salter).
3. Buy A Keytar and use it uncooly. p.s. Lights with Keytar = not cool vs Peaches with Keytar = style.
4. Try to grab on to a cool sound that's currently happening at the moment. In this case ask Josh Groban writer, "Hey Tawgs, can you study and then rip off some cool dubstepish beats?"
5. Write unmemorable songs.
6. Oh I also forgot... lastly, sing with an unmemorable voice.
Strange fit for this album to come out on Last Gang Entertainment (home of Crystal Castles and MSTRKRFT). That's only thing Lights did right.
Here's a link to the free stream of the album compliments of Last Gang Records.
1st single is "Toes" (which again, is not bad and best song on the album). Decide for yourself and discuss.