Review: Maroon 5: Way Overexposed

6/27/12
3.0ARTIST INFO

That creep from "The Voice," I mean, Maroon 5, has released a new album. Do you care? Me neither.

Overexposed, Maroon 5's fourth studio album, was released this week on A&M. I actually tried to find a leak of it last week, but couldn't, I'm guessing because no one really gave a shit. 

OK, I know some girls are able to get past Adam Levine's whiny, auto-tuned voice because they find him attractive. But with his thin lips, snake eyes and diminutive stature, I don't really get it. Furthermore, his music is soulless and desperate, and on Overexposed, it is especially so.

 

Maroon 5 is one of those groups that tries to incorporate every genre of pop music into each album, hoping that something sticks. For example, the first single from Overexposed, "Payphone" is a pop-rock piece of crap featuring Wiz Khalifa and repeated use of the "f" word (so edgy and genre-bending!) What I wanna know is, who the FUCK uses a payphone anymore?

A douchebag radio DJ might describe another trying-too-hard dud from the album, "One More Night," as "reggae-infused," while Peter Tosh turns in his grave. Songs like "Lucky Strike" and "Love Somebody" are more "clubby" and seem to be trying to recreate the success of "Moves Like Jagger" (which, if you ask me, is one of the worst songs ever).

 

Then, of course, there are really deep piano ballads on the album like "Sad." The chorus of this song (I shit you not) is literally just Adam Levine singing (whining), "I'm so sad. I'm so sad." Really soulful stuff.

 

The name of the album should really be "Overproduced." I admit it: when their first album, Songs About Jane, came out in 2002, I sort of dug it. Probably because I was still a teenager. But also because it was at least a little bit original and didn't stink of desperation and Justin Bieber perfume.

However, as it's entirely lacking in creativity and shamelessly trying to compete with the likes of Ke$ha and other tweenybopper Top 40 crap, I would say that it's a stretch to even call Overproduced, I mean, Overexposed, I mean, "Over It" music at all. 

The tragedy here is that Maroon 5 are actually pretty serious players...great and well capable musicians but while their album title was supposed to be tongue and cheek...it might ring more true as reality.  

My favorite Bob Lefsetz sums it up best here.  

Oh, and the cover art is butt-ugly. Xoxo ShannonG

Lyrics to Payphone:

I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?
Yeah, I, I know it's hard to remember,
The people we used to be...
It's even harder to picture,
That you're not here next to me.
You say it's too late to make it,
But is it too late to try?
And in our time that you wasted
All of our bridges burned down
I've wasted my nights,
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed,
Still stuck in that time,
When we called it love,
But even the sun sets in paradise
I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?
If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would still be holding you like this
 All those fairy tales are full of shit
 All those fairy tales are full of it.
 One more fucking love song, I'll be sick.
 One more stupid love song, I'll be sick
Oh, you turned your back on tomorrow
'Cause you forgot yesterday.
I gave you my love to borrow,
But you just gave it away.
You can't expect me to be fine,
I don't expect you to care
I know I've said it before,
But all of my bridges burned down
I've wasted my nights,
You turned out the lights
Now I'm paralyzed,
Still stuck in that time,
When we called it love,
But even the sun sets in paradise
I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?
If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would still be holding you like this
 All those fairy tales are full of shit
 All those fairy tales are full of it.
 One more fucking love song, I'll be sick.
 One more stupid love song, I'll be sick
Now I'm at a payphone
[Wiz Khalifa:]
Man, fuck that shit
I'll be out spending all this money
While you're sitting round wondering
Why it wasn't you who came up from nothing,
Made it from the bottom
Now when you see me I'm stunning,
And all of my cars start with a push of a button
Telling me the chances I blew up
Or whatever you call it,
Switch the number to my phone
So you never could call it,
Don't need my name on my shirt,
You can tell it I'm ballin.
Swish, what a shame could have got picked
Had a really good game but you missed your last shot
So you talk about who you see at the top
Or what you could have saw but sad to say it's over for.
Phantom pulled up valet open doors
Wiz like go away, got what you was looking for
Now it's me who they want, so you can go and take
that little piece of shit with you.
I'm at a payphone trying to call home
All of my change I spent on you
Where have the times gone, baby it's all wrong
Where are the plans we made for two?
If "Happy Ever After" did exist,
I would still be holding you like this
 All those fairy tales are full of shit
 One more fucking love song, I'll be sick.
 One more stupid love song, I'll be sick
Now I'm at a payphone... 

 

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