WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BLACKBEAR “ANONYMOUS” TAGS MY OWN OFFICE’S WALL

5/1/19
Blackbear - Anonymous

So I walked into to work and was greeted with this:

“No one at this moment is hating life as much as me right now. I literally would rather be reviewing blackbear’s ANONYMOUS album than scrubbing blackbear ANONYMOUS off this wall.”

“Geez it’s bright out here.”

“I’ve never seen Hollywood in the daylight.”

“Ew, what is that smell?”

“Interscope why don't you send us an email or put up a billboard like everyone else to announce a new album?”

“I should have probably worn gloves or a plastic bag on my hands. I should have probably not mixed ammonia and bleach.”

“I did need a tan, I guess this is one way to do it.”

“Tagging your friends on Instagram is cool, but who da eff tags a wall?” 

“Banksy.”

“I don't want to be thinking about this right now... but ... I need to Google if you can get an STD from chewed gum off the sidewalk.”

“Gawd, It really freaking smells.”

“Can I include manicures as a tax write-off?”

“Why the hell am I still living in L.A. I could be on a beach somewhere. I should have stayed in San Diego. Nothing ever happens in San Diego.”

“Is this what it means to experience cruel and unusual punishment?”

“I wonder if vegan spray paint scrubs off easier.”

“Dammit what is that smell?”

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